Being an Angel

Posted on: September 26, 2007

I don’t think anyone can believe this because I can’t believe it myself…

I just did a good deed…

I had to go back to One Raffles Quay to get some files back to the client’s office. Before turning left into the retail link towards One Raffles Quay, there’s this stairs. 30 metres away from this stairs, I saw this elderly man carrying a large pull luggage down the stairs… When I reached the stairs, I saw him walking back up. I naturally, without hesitation, took the hand-carry bag at the side and brought it to him… He thanked me, I nodded and continued on my way…

Suddenly I felt like I grew wings and have a halo…

I know you can’t believe it… I am still surprised with what I did… In fact, I cannot accept what I did… I mean, it’s Dickson… I don’t donate to coin tins… I don’t buy fund-raising tickets… I laugh at people who slip on wet floor and fall…

I thought I know who I am but maybe not… I think I am pretty lost within my visages and forgot who I really am… All this time, intentionally putting myself in bad light… Why? So that people expect less from me and I won’t disappoint them…

Recently, I realise people really don’t know me… Or should I say, I realise people are rather convinced by the Dickson I portray and they see… As much as I would like more people to know who I really am, I can’t expect much because I am the one who have been misleading them and I am rather lost about who I am too…

I basically sit on the fence for everything in my Life… Neither extremes and very random… Sometimes I am nice, sometimes I am not. Sometimes I can accept certain things, sometimes I can’t. Sometimes I am firm, sometimes I am flexible. Everything is random for me with no definite answers.

I wonder when is the time for me to quit my own drama, find myself and start being me… I am still quite comfortable with who “I” am now though…

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